


in which love does not conquer all

by TuesdayTerrible



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Angst, Did I mention angst, F/M, Goodbyes, Gratsu freeform, Gray Fullbuster centric, Gruvia freeform, Implied Natsu/Lucy - Freeform, iceshell, losticeshell, moving forward, my heart hurts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-04
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-10 22:35:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11701266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TuesdayTerrible/pseuds/TuesdayTerrible
Summary: "Every time you laugh,Every time you grieve,pieces of those moments become ours as well, that's what it is to be a member of our guild. When a member is on cloud nine we all float, when a member is outraged, we all clenched our teeth..When a member weeps, we all wipe our eyes" -MakarovDrabbles and one-shots of all the beloved fairy tail members as I come up with them.1.Nali2.Gray-centric





	1. in which love does not conquer all

**Author's Note:**

> This is my way of dealing with the injustice of Nali. I dont mind whom Natsu ends up with. In fact, I love them all and would ship them with almost anyone.  
> But I cant get over the fact they fed us all this backstory of their relationship from childhood to her death and then she comes back to life only to be almost completely ignored by Natsu. It just...feels wrong that they didnt (at least as far as Ive seen omg no spoilers please!) get any closure. So that's what I'm attempting to give them here. Some closure.

He's walking without really paying attention to where he's going.

He feels...overwhelmed in a way he hasnt felt in a very long time. His fists clenched at his side are shaking as he walks through the woods taking him down a long a path he's walked so many times in his youth. His heart aches in a way his brain hasnt quite caught up with. It's also muscle memory. This path. These woods. This....

...grave. He shouldn't have been caught off guard seeing her there sitting on top of her tombstone he built for her. He should have been able to smell her from far away, the fact that he didnt is more than enough proof that his head is not in the game. He takes a moment to admire her, her short white hair and he wonders briefly if it's as soft as it was in their youth. His heart clenches at the sight of her, breathing, watching the sunset as they had done together so many times.

She turns her gaze a way from the setting sun, the wind shifting through her white locks as she catches his eye and she smiles immediately. 

“Welcome home.”

The ache in his chest intensifies and the dragon slayer is certain he can not breathe. He refuses to cry despite the fact he feels the tears burning against his eyes, and he has to push the words out even though the weight in his chest is trying so hard to keep them down.

“I'm home.” he says softly, and he wants to smile- to give her what she has always, always given him. But it hurts to much so he just swallows instead and tries not to stare.

“We havent...spent much time together...since Ive been back.” she says thoughtfully, and his chest aches with every word out of her mouth. It's like driving a nail into a coffin. She stares at him then so intensely he's forced to meet her gaze and he feels like hes about to burst to the point he cant take it. 

“Lisanna.” her name comes out in a choked whisper, like a desperate prayer and he closes the distance between them, falling to his knees at the bottom of her grave, burying his head in her lap as the sobs he so desperately tried to suppress begin to wrack his body.

She smiles but it doesnt reach her eyes, and though he is not looking up- he can tell she is crying as well, he can smell her tears, as she runs her fingers through his hair. She is comforting him despite her pain and he realizes with another stab of remorse, he was never good enough for someone like her anyway.

“It's okay.” she says and it's anything but okay because her voice is cracking with tears and it is his fault that she is. It is his fault she is in so much pain. “We were just kids you know? It was...Its been two years so...I didnt...I didnt expect you to stop living your life.” 

He wants to tell her if he had known he would have found her sooner. He wants to tell her if he had known he would have waited. He wants to tell her he's sorry that he fell in love with someone else in her absence. But the words die on his tongue unable to force them out of his mouth.

“Natsu.” she says softly. “She really is a great girl. I hope she makes you very happy.” 

“Ive missed you.” He manages to choke out and it feels so insignificant because he cant tell her how many times he's stood at this grave saying the same thing, thinking he would never see her again. 

“Thank you...for keeping your promise.”

He looks up at her then, his tears drying on his face and he knows now this is the time to say all the things they'll never get to say again. “I loved you.” his voice cracks, and he still does but...

She smiles, and god he loves that she can, even with tears running down her face. She has a strength that he has no idea how to gain. 

“I love you.” She says softly, placing a kiss on his forehead before slowly sliding off her grave and rising to a stand. “I'll see you back at the guild real soon, okay?” 

.

He stays kneeling at her grave long after she leaves. He stays until the sky is black and stars litter the sky. 

“Okay.” He says finally even though no one is around to hear it. He finds his feet and dries his eye with the back of his arm and proceeds there, the ache in his chest- finally a little more bearable.


	2. how ice melts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This isnt how ice melts. He thinks before blacking out entirely, wondering if maybe it was for good this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think Gray Fullbuster is my favorite character. And I plan to give him a more worthy contribution- but I had to write out some of my feels in the mean time.  
> So I hope you enjoy this short Gray-centric piece with sprinkles of Gratsu and Gruvia. <3

 

Lost Ice Shell :  _While similar to ice shell, its 100x stronger, the drawback being that lost ice shell erases the castors existence from all who know them. Forever._

* * *

 

Natsu lunges forward desperate limbs blazing, but as he moves to smash Gray's head into the ground. He misses. _How, how could I miss?_ The pain that scorches the way up the dragon slayers is unbareable and he falls to his knees, a hand coming to grasp his chest.

 

“Natsu!” Happy and Lucy cry in unison as they race towards their fallen comarade.

 

“Is that?” Lucy asks eyes wide. “Zeref?!”

 

“Natsu did you?” Happy asks, but Lucy interupts before he goes any farther. “This is ice magic.. who on are earth?”

 

“Natsu...why are you crying?”

 

The dragon slayer stares at the frozen structure of the man before them, his heart aching in a painful absence for something he cant remember. The tears continue streaming down his face as he manages to find his words. “I failed.”

 

He cant tell them how. He just knows it to be true.

 

.

 

The last thing Gray Fullbuster hears is “STTOPPP ITT!!” as his body is torn to shreds to create the barrier which currently holds Zeref.

 

It's a strange place to be in, He is dead- but somehow he isnt. Sometimes, he doesnt feel anything. Incapable of thought. It's like he simply doesnt exsist. But other times, he is conscioius and he is there holding the ice firm- the love of his guild making him strong.

 

He has no concept of time. He has no idea if he's been holding the ice together 5 mins, or 500 years. He wishes he could leave, float over and watch them. See if they're still alive. He wants to see the hall lively with booze and brawls, smiles and laughter. He wants to see if Lucy published her book yet. Or just how much Wendy has grown. He wants to see Erza requip and Juvia's smile. But more than anything he wishes could see Natsu fight.

 

Grays last memory is of the dragon slayer is with tears streaming down his face. He doesnt regret his decision. He just isnt in as much peace as hed hoped he be.

 

.

 

Makarov is drinking heavily when they return, his face flushed and eyes vacant.

 

“Whats up with him?” Lucy asks, though she cant help but feel it to. Somewhere deep in side, a sadness blooming in her chest. A metaphorical black cloud blanketing all of them.

 

“He says he feels like he just lost a child.” Cana says throwing a bottle of beer back like a shot, and wiping the spilled alcohol on her lips with the back of her hand.

 

Natsu, Lucy, Erza and even Wendy join them in drinks. It is not merry.

 

.

 

The next time Gray is capable of thought he thinks of Ur. He wonders if this is what it was like for her. He wonders if she floated for all those years in an out like he was. He wonders if he's capable of lonliness. He's not sure. He thinks the only thing he feels is restlessness.

 

He thinks of her small smile as she bid him farewell. He thinks he may have always had a deathwish after that. He thinks this wasnt exactly what he had in mind.

 

.

 

Leon is walking when it happens. The pain that crushes his lungs is unbareable taking his knees out from under him and he screams.

 

His guild members rush to his aid, overlapping voices of whats wrong surround him. He cant answer. All he can do is scream.

 

.

 

Natsu stares towards Juvia- her eyes are sunken in and he knows the girl has been crying for a while now. She invites him into her apartment, and theyre filled with chibi big headed plushies with dark hair and a fairytail mark. He is conflicted as part of him wants to laugh, and another part of him wants to cry.

 

“I don't know who this is.” Juvia says staring towards Natsu, her voice shaking.

 

He ends up doing both, laughing, tears rolling down his face. “Looks just like the stupid stripper.”

 

“Stripper?” Juvia says her face flushing. “You think I got intoxicated and fell in love with a stripper?!”

 

“I guess theres only one way to find out!” Natsu says smiling widely exposing his sharp canines and grabbing Juvia by the hand.

 

.

 

He was gone for a while this time he thinks. He's tired. He wishes he could hold this form for everyone and be gone for good. He is tired. He thought death was suppose to be easy comparitively. He doesnt think he thinks so anymore.

 

.

 

It isnt until theres another threat do they remember. An ice mage of sorts.

 

The ice wrapped around Natsu's wrists like spiky little ropes, digging into his blood. The pain is sharp. The cold burning his skin and sinking into his blood. A whole different type of burn- but it was nothing. Nothing but an insult.

 

“This is nothing.” his voice raising an octave as the flames burned its way up the make shift ice rope, ice shattering in every direction. “NOTHING” he screamed, jumping into the air his fists on fire, eyes blazing. “Nothing compared to Gray's power.”

 

It hits them, all of them then, as they stare at the scorched ice mage on the floor of the guild.

 

Natsu's eyes widen as he watches in horror as his guild mates begin to fall. He watches Urza fall against the bar stool, Lucy slide down the wall onto the floor, Wendy clutching a pillar in a desperate attempt to keep herself up, limbs shaking with greif. He watches as one by one, they collapse from their pain. He manages to turn his head to the side just in time to see, more so than hear, Juvia scream.

 

He see's their agony- but he watches it as if on mute as visions of his rival- his enemy- his best _fucking-_ friend play before his eyes.

 

“No.” he says the weight of it finally pulling the dragon slayer- the last on his feet- to his knees.

 

.

 

All of a sudden, he is here again. And he is in pain. Catastrophic, agonizing pain. He realizes this was something he did not miss. Something he, or whatever was left of him, shouldnt be feeling. It felt like his molecules, because surely that was all that was left of him, were being pulled apart.

 

This isnt how ice melts. He thinks before blacking out entirely, wondering if maybe it was for good this time.

 

.

 

Juvia is the first on her feet standing above Natsu extending her hand.

 

“We need to help him.”

 

“Juvia...he..” his voice is choked as he remembers being only inches away from him. He remembers the ice that clung to zerefs form. He remembers and fresh tears spill from his eyes in the process.

 

Juvia leans down to him, hand still extended a sad smile on her face, tears still fresh in her eyes.

“Even if we cant. Natsu Juvia needs... I need to see him.” she says her voice growing softer. “Dont you?”

Natsu doesnt answer, instead he places his hand in hers.

 

.

 

It's dark when Gray comes to except instead of emptiness and nothing- he sees stars.

 

“They're beautiful arent they?” Zeref says from somewhere below him. Gray cant see him, he cant even lift his head to see where he is and it makes his heart thud heavily in his chest. He takes a deep breath and feels his lungs expand accompanied by a rivit of pain on his right side. The pain makes his head swim and the onslaught of emotions makes him want to go back under.

 

He is relieved to breathe. He is devestated he is breathing.

 

“Why?” he manages, his voice graspy and sore but somehow, still his own. “Why did I fail?”

 

The tears slip out softly and it lessens the pressure in his head somewhat.

 

“I imagine they remembered you.” Zeref says. “And it broke.”

 

“You're injured.” Gray says flatly.

 

“Drained.” Zeref replies. “I can not move.”

 

Gray tries to turn his head down to inspect himself only to be met with a lack of ability. He wonders if he even has a complete body. He wonders if he's laying here, finally dying out this time.

 

“What was it like?” Gray asks, thinking this may be his last conversation and realzing he's been craving to have one more since he froze the bastard a few feet away from him.

 

Zeref smiles, and responds in turn. “Lets just say I have a new perspective on hell.” Grey thinks maybe, he feels the same way too. It's quiet for a moment before Zeref's voice floats over the breeze to him again. “Dont think it was their love that brought you back. We've been....suspended for months.”

 

“It doesnt matter.” Gray says. “I'll do this as many times as necessary to keep them safe.”

 

“Eventually, Id be the only one laying here.” Zeref says finally.

 

“Eventually, it'll end for us both.” Gray counters.

 

They don't talk again after that.

 

.

The sun is rising when Gray comes to, its a beautiful red and orange and it makes his heart ache. It was so nice to see something other than darkness, he had forgotten how beautiful life was. He manages to lift his head today well enough to get a good look at himself. His body is covered in crack like scars that makes him look extremely fragile compared to tough. He has a large chunk of his left leg missing, and a particularly nasty looking puncture wound, also on the left side, on his abdomen.

 

He looks a little forward to see Zeref is also moving, not much, but he watches as the dark wizard seems to test his fingers, sparks of magic energy fluttering at the tips.

 

“I'll heal faster than you.” Zeref says, his face void emotion.

 

“Probably.” Grey replies. He wishes he could sit up but that doesnt seem to be an option.

 

“You're going to bleed out.” Zeref says again.

 

“Probably.” Grey replies again.

 

He wonders absently, if death will be more peaceful than whatever ice shell was.

 

.

 

The guild reaches the destination just as the sun is beginning to set. Some mutter amongst themselves about the absence of Zeref. But Natsu's eyes have already found Gray's and his injuries.

 

“Wendy” he screams taking off , his feet falling out from under him and he rolls the rest of the way there- crashing hazardously into Gray's beaten form.

 

“Watch where you are going flame brain.” Grey teases eyes closed. He knows he should open them and trace the love of their faces into his memory. But Gray is tired. He cant remember a time when he wasnt tired. He thinks he's ready to be done.

 

“Shut your mouth not your eyes ice queen.” Natsu says smiling but its weak, tears already forming in his eyes. “Dont die!”

 

He feels Natsu's tears on his face and he opens his eyes and he wonders what Natsu must see in them that makes him take a breath like that. He wonders if they look as tired as he feels.

 

“You're alive Gray, so LIVE!”

 

He wants to tell him he feels more alive right now than he has in longer than he can remember. He laughs, but it's weak.

 

“It was you wasnt it?” Gray says. “Youre the reason I'm...” he pauses making a sloppy gesture to his body. “here.”

 

Suddenly Juvias sobbing into his neck and Wendy, Urza and Lucy are at his side and his vision blurs slightly.

 

Gray thinks he means to tell him thank you, but the words for some reason cant seem to make their way out out.

 

 


End file.
